Dani Disaster (rejectedpunk9) wrote in nimrod_fiction,
Dani Disaster

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~No one really knows what's inside my heart, because i'm too scared to let it out~

Hello My dears... I come bearing slashyness!!!

Title: You’re the Only Guy I’d Ever Fight For (Mike’s P.O.V.)
Author: Moi, Merci Beaucoup.
Rating: R
Pairing: young!Billie/Mike, implied Billie/James
Disclaimer: C’est Vrai! Ce ne pas faux!
Summary: Read it Dammit! I’ve got cookies!! Hehehe and a few other things.. This is a result of getting into a fight with Amanda and hating James Moorefield’s guts and wanting to kick him in the nuts. So yeah… This is basically the easiest way of taking out my anger on James w/o doing it physically… Damn am I good.. *evil laugh* btw me and James are cool now, but I had to do this anyway bc it was just to fun to resist... sorry James I love you dear!!!!
Deds: angie_aiken, fuckedhercat, Nikki, and um.... the elmo undies and my contacts (yes i got contacts today... *dances*) um... Lancey... because he commented on my myspace and because his mohawk is sooo fuckin sexy!!! um.... my dear friend Matt... and um... James and Chris-e-Chin!!!!

Part 1 - The Truth

We sat in his bedroom playing around with our guitars. He always looked so beautiful when he was trying to perfect his chords. His black hair covered his eyes and his tongue stuck out of his mouth just a little. It was so cute. He was cute, okay maybe he was more than cute, but the way he looked at the moment he looked just soo adorable.

“Mikey?” he said as he looked up from his guitar.

“Yeah Bill..” I said.

“Does this sound right?” he asked as he began to play a few chords.

“Yeah that sounds about right.” I said.

“Alright.” he said. “I wasn’t sure if it sounded good or not.”

“Everything you play sounds good.” I said.

“Thanks Mike.” he said with a smile that almost melted my whole body.

“Anytime.” I said as I continued “pretending” to do what I was doing.

I was only “pretending” because I didn’t want him to know I was watching him. Staring at him with both my eyes and my heart. With my heavy heart. I really don’t know how to explain it. I had a burden I was carrying. I had known since the day that I laid eyes on Billie that this would be a problem. He was beautiful and amazing and I was falling more in love with him by the moment. That was the only thing standing in my way. Well except for the fact that I couldn’t tell him that I loved him. I don’t even think he’s ever kissed a guy. I don’t even think I’d stand a chance against… HER.

The girl at school that Billie liked or at least it seemed like he liked. I didn’t even have the heart to ask him if he liked her, because I was scared that my heart would break into a million pieces if he said he liked her.

“Mikey!” he said pulling me from my thoughts.

“Yeah?” I said.

“What is up with you today?” he asked as he put his guitar down on the ground. “You seem more distracted than normal.”

“I’m fine.” I said as I bit my lip.

“Don’t pull that ‘I’m fine’ bullshit with me.” he said. “I know something’s up. What is it?”

“Nothing.” I said. “I’m just thinking.”

“About what?” he asked.

“Someone.” I said. “I mean something.”

“Who is it Mike?” he asked curiously.

“Someone.” I said.

“Who? Come on tell me.” he said. “I won’t say anything.”

“You don’t know her.” I said. “She’s in one of my classes.”

“Mikey, I’m in most of your classes. I won’t tell come on just tell me who she is.” he said.

“Billie, please I really don’t want to talk about her right now.” I said.

“Alright.” he said. “Fine.”

He laid down on the bed and made sure that he didn’t lay his feet on me like he normally did. He seemed like something was eating at him too.

“What’s up with you today?” I asked. “You say something’s up with me, but there’s something up with you too.”

“I’m thinking about James.” he said.

“James who?” I asked.

“You know him. He’s in our Biology class. The guy with the long hair that always covers his eyes. The only other punk rocker in that class, other than us. The Bi guy.” he said.

“Oh.” I said. “Why are you thinking about him?”

“I think I like him.” he said.

“What do you mean you like him?” I asked.

“I mean I like him like him.” he said. “Like I’d go out with him, like him.”

My eyes widened.

“You got something you wanna share with me there Billie?” I asked.

“I think I like guys. In fact, I know I like guys.” he said.

The words I’d been dying to hear drip from his mouth like foam from the mouth of a dog with rabies. But he liked James.

“So you like him?” I said. “Do you know if he likes you like that?”

“I don’t know.” he said. “But I’m going to find out tomorrow at school.”

“Well let me know if he likes you.” I said.

“You know I’ll tell you Mikey.” he said. “I tell you everything.”

“Yeah.” I whispered as I moved my head so that Billie couldn’t see the tears fall from my eyes. “I’ll be right back.”

“Alright.” he said.

I got up and walked out of Billie’s, well our bedroom. I needed to take a walk and clear my head. I walked through the hallway and past the living room and straight out the door. I couldn’t have gotten out of there faster. I couldn’t believe it. Billie wanted to go out with a guy, but that guy wasn’t me. Why did he have to fall for James? Why couldn’t it have been me?

I walked down the street trying to figure out why Billie had fallen for James. What was it about James that was better than me that he couldn’t have fallen for me instead? Questions pouring into my mind like milk into a bowl of cereal, questions I couldn’t answer. Some of them I didn’t even want to know the answer to. All I wanted to know was why Billie had fallen for James.

I had loved him since the second I laid eyes on him. I had been there for him when no one else was, when no one else wanted to be. I had gone to hell and back with Billie and lived to tell the tale. I’ve been his best friend for almost 7 years. What do I get? I get to sit back and watch him fall for another guy. A guy that I know doesn’t deserve Billie or his love. I know all about James. He’s an asshole. He wouldn’t treat Billie the way he deserved to be treated. He wouldn’t be there for him, like I am. He wouldn’t love him like I love him. He doesn’t deserve him.


“I’m sorry.” a familiar voice said as he helped me to my feet.

“Its alright.” I said. “I guess I wasn’t looking where I was going.”

“Apparently not.” he said. “You alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I said.

“Alright.” he said. “Got something on your mind?”

“Yeah, I’ve got a lot on my mind.” I said.

“Feel like talking?” he asked.

“No.” I said. “I’m fine.”

“Alright.” he said. “See you at school tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I’ll see ya.” I said as I continued walking.

I continued walking, trying hard not to go back and say anything to James. I didn’t want Billie to know I said anything to James, so I didn’t say anything. I just continued walking and thinking.

“I really don’t know what to say.” I said to myself.

“Hey Mike.” a voice from behind me said.

“Yeah.” I said as I turned around only to see Billie behind me.

“Why did you leave?” he asked.

“I needed a break and I needed to clear my head.” I explained.

“Oh.” he said. “Well come on home, dinner’s ready.”

“Alright.” I said as I followed him.

“So what were you clearing your head for?” he asked.

“I just needed to think that’s all.” I said. “I needed to figure some things out.”

“Like what?” he asked. “You normally talk to me about everything, and you can’t even talk to him so I can at least try to help you. What is wrong with you Mikey? Are you sick?”

“No.” I laughed. “I’m fine. I just don’t know. I’m confused I guess.”

“About what?” he asked.

“Love.” I said.

“Aww… Mikey’s in love with someone.” he said in his sweet little voice, that was to die for.

“Yeah.” I said. “Just don’t get used to saying that.”

“Why not?” he asked.

“The person I’m in love with doesn’t love me.” I said. “Their into someone else.”

“Aww I’m sorry Mike.” he said as he hugged me. “Who is it?”

“We’re home.” I said changing the subject. “Let’s go eat.”

“Alright.” he said seeming somewhat disappointed that he didn’t find out who I liked.


“Mikey?” he said as we laid in bed.

“Yeah.” I said.

“Do you think I’ve got a chance with James?” he asked.

“I don’t know Billie.” I said as I turned over so that I wasn’t facing him.

“Sore subject?” he asked.

“Yeah.” I said. “Very.”

“I’m sorry.” he said. “Goodnight then.”

“Goodnight Billie.” I said as I turned to face him and he hugged me.

“I love you man.” he said.

“I love you too Bill.” I said as he closed his eyes.

I sat there and watched him fall asleep. He looked so sweet when he was sleeping.

“I’ll love you always Billie.” I said. “Always.”
comments mes cheres? bien? mal? comme ci comme ca?

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